Marriages Jokes

A happy marriage is a matter of give and take, , the husband gives and the wife takes.

Marriage is a 3-ring circus - engagement ring , wedding ring and suffering

Marriage is not a word . Its a sentence ....(a life sentence !)

A womean was relling her friend ,"it was i who made my husband a millionaire."And what was he before you married him?"asked the friend .The woman replied ,"a multi-millionaire".

There was this woman who had an artist paint a potrait of her covered with the most amazingly beautiful and expensive jewels.Her explanation - "if i die and my husband remarries , i want his next wife to go crazy looking for the jewels."

Getting married is very much like going to a restaurant with friends. You order what you want ,and when you see what the order fellow has , you wis you had ordered that.

Love is one long sweet dream , and marriage is the alarm clock

Husband to wife : why do you keep reading our marriage licence?.Wife to husband : I am looking for a loophole

Q : why are husbands like lawn mowers?
A : they 're hard to get started, emit foul odors , and don't work half the time !

The definition of a perfect wife ? one who helps the husband with the dishes

There was this lover who said that he would go through hell for her . they got married- now he is going through Hell !

I 've got a good friend who married a Doctor .One day he told her :" You need to do something to spice up our love - making".Soon there after , he came home and found her in bed with another man who is also an M.D. "Why?" asked her husband ." You said i needed to do something to spice up our love -making ; i just wanted to get a second opinion ", she replied...

Q: Why do brides wear white?
A: To blend in with everything else in the kitchen

Men are like chocolate bars...sweet, smooth and they usually head right for your hips.

A little kid asks his dad ," daddy , how much does it cost to get married does is cost to get merried?", replied the father ," im still praying for it ....."
" no idea , replied the father . "i;m still paying for it ...".

One day a man inserted an advert in,the local classifieds:"wife wanted". Next daya he received a hundred letters.They all said the same thing :"you can have mine ".

Marriages Jokes

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